“Are you gay?” quipped one of my friends a few years back at high school.

It was not actually out of context, since I did spend a lot of time (9 years yo!) studying in all boys’ school. I would answer his question with an expression of a serial killer gunning for the headshot of the president. I guess it was this schooling period that made me rather shy and unnatural towards girls. But hey, if I am not shy and unnatural, I won’t be the Afiq Fikri you know (or don’t know) right now. But I’m improving and evolving all the time. I guess.

And so, I was at the receiving end of gay jokes most of the time. Sometimes those jokes really hurt me that I would just retreat at some spot alone and start to cry. It was a really dark period of my life. As dark as night, as lonesome as a dove.

Ok. I was just joking. The last few sentences were there to amplify the experience of reading this article.

But as time passed by, I got used to those jokes. And I couldn’t help but laugh off at the fact that people think I’m gay.

Now, it seems there are really gay people out there, which I thought was just a myth. I stumbled across a documentary called ‘A Jihad for Love’ about gay Muslims when I was hunting down for quality documentaries during the winter break. I was a bit surprised and angered by it. I tried to look find the illegal copy of the show but it was to no avail.

Luckily, there was another TV program called simply ‘Gay Muslims’ in the UK. And it was available on YouTube. When asked what is the basis of such behavior on their part, since Islam doesn’t tolerate homosexuality, one of them had the explanation.

7 : 80-84 And (We sent) Lut when he said to his people: What! do you commit an indecency which any one in the world has not done before you? Most surely you come to males in lust besides females; nay you are an extravagant people. And the answer of his people was no other than that they said: Turn them out of your town, surely they are a people who seek to purify (themselves). So We delivered him and his followers, except his wife; she was of those who remained behind. And We rained upon them a rain; consider then what was the end of the guilty.

We all know of the story of the prophet Lut in the al-Quran. And so they argued that, in a verse above, the usage of the word ‘lust’ (shahwat in Arabic) referred to indecent sexual behaviors. It didn’t apply the word ‘love’ in the sentence.

And what he is experiencing with his partner, he says, is called love. So he deems his actions are right because probably he isn’t involved in any abnormal sexual doings.

From the stories of the prophet Lut in the al-Quran, the gist of the verses tells us that homosexuality is intolerable in Islam. Unacceptable. There are a lot of non Muslims who are already confused with the religion and the production of such documentaries won’t be of much help.

I have to admit my 2 favourite writers are gay. Douglas Coupland and Chuck Palahniuk are both gays. I hate this fact but in their environment it is considered acceptable.

But what I am surprised is that there is a freedom to interpret such verses according to their personal thinking. It’s true that al-Quran is a revelation meant for everyone and at times we are able to interpret some verses ourselves. But the way they have interpreted it is blatantly out of context for me.

This is due to the large chunks of ‘freedom movement’ and ‘human rights’ going on in the world. There is also the Al-Fatiha Foundation in American for gay rights. Freedom this freedom that. The thing is there is a fine line of demarcation of freedom, a border which can’t be crossed. This freedom movement puts desires and the human mind and emotions ahead of anything else to quench their demands for a just life, with full freedom of expression. The human mind is limited, and the divinity of religion seems to have lost its cause.

Freedom is just a state of mind. If freedom refers to 100% being able to do what you want to do, then the word itself should not have even existed. If freedom is limited, then it's not the freedom those philosophers and activists are preaching about.

As for the interpretation part, there are scholars us who have studied, understood and mastered the al-Quran. So if they are confused about anything, they should always refer to their commentaries on the al-Quran.

In the end, there are those who really want to change. I’ve read a letter sent by a husband of his troubles with the feelings of homosexuality. But he is trying hard to overcome such emotions and that deserves a salute.

I hope we are always led to the righteous path. Amin.


ujai said...

sapa yg tnya hang gay? aku rase dia tanya soklan tu sb dia suka hang kot afiq...

QifA said...

tu crita zaman sekolah la uzair. hoho

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